Have you ever had that night when you were just afraid to go to sleep?
That night when you just begin to close your eyes, you hear a sound coming from your closet. Your heart starts to race, wondering what it was. You finally calm down and decide it was nothing. You close your eyes again and suddenly you hear a very strange sound but this time it's coming from underneath your bed. You begin to wonder if you should look. What could it possible be you wonder? The boogeyman? A perv? What is it? Your mind gets so preoccupied that you lose track of the situation at hand and right when you do a sudden whistle of the wind bangs against your window. You are scared now. What is going on? You decide to turn on the lights. You can't take it anymore. You need to make sure no one is in your room. You begin to search and search but you don't find anything and you never will. See the thing that haunts you will never be seen. The thing you are so afraid of lies in the shadows waiting for the right opportunity to strike. What you are afraid of is MY BRILLIANT MIND.
Oh readers, welcome back to the blog. I hope you had a good time bending me over the barrel and really giving it to me, I know I sure did.
You know you could at least buy me dinner first before you screw me.
Let's get this all out on the table before I begin to rip on everyone.
So I tried trading Matt for a draft pick. Vetoed.
So I tried trading Sean for a draft pick. Vetoed
So I tried trading Will for a draft pick. Vetoed.
Everyone has there opinion so I accept everyone who vetoed.
Cool so did everyone go on Espn to veto it? Nope
Everyone called nick to veto it. Alright, that's fine.
Then Nick proceeds to tell me that all names will remain anonymous because some people came to him and didn't want super strong Corey to find out.
This is the part I don't accept. If you want to remain anonymous go on Espn.com and veto the trade you lazy slackers. Honestly here are the steps.
1. Open Firefox/explorer/safari/etc.
2. Go to http://www.espn.com/
3. On the top right corner there is a link that says "sign in"
4. Sign in
5. Go to our fantasy league
6. Find the trade I am in
7. Decline trade
When nick told me people contacted him and wanted to remain annonymous, I said that's fine if everyone goes to Espn and declines it there is nothing I can do. Then he says no I have word from everyone that they don't want the trade. Okay then tell me the people who don't want the trade. Nick says I can't, they want to be kept out of this.
Best part about this all, is that Nick doesn't want the trade to go through either.
So someone who doesn't want the trade to go thru is now going to tell me all these different people contacted him to say we don't want the trade and then you are going to tell me all these peoples names won't be revealed.
Yeah that seems fair.
Hey also next time commish before you give it to me good could you pick me up some chocolates. I like to be spoiled a bit before I get screwed.
Honestly imagine this situation and tell me how it's not any different from what I am going through.
Hey nick, everyone contacted me to let me know that they want the trades to go through.
Oh you want the names of who they are?
I can't tell you that, they want to remain anonymous.
Also I will pick you up at 8 for dinner and then we can head pack to my place so I can screw you over some more.
Yeah, that seems fair. This whole process is BS.
This is the reason why Gabe left this league. He didn't want to play in a league full of total anarchy. He didn't want to be ruled by Nick "Fidel" Brown.
You know what enough about Nick, I want to rip on other people now. Let's get into it.
Readers, what up? It's ya boi. Back and better than ever.
Readers I have so much to say to all of you but I was informed by the commish to keep the blog pg friendly so I will try my best.
First, let's talk about the league name. The captains league. Ha.
A captain is a man/woman who is a leader and one who commands respect from others. I am looking at the league members right now and I don't see any captains (talking strictly about fantasy football here). I see a bunch of fairy's or little cry babies.
Here's a song for all the girls in the league and I'm not just talking about Cheryl and Judas. Oops I mean Cheryl and Melinda. http://youtu.be/
I vote to change the league name to the little sissy girls who most definitely don't have any cojones league. To all the men in the league except Matt please return your man card and have a gender change immediately. You make all men look bad with your "ohhhh that's unfair and (crying) but commish I wasn't creative/innovative to think of that so don't let him have it". You make me sick.
Take a hard look in the mirror and realize you have disrespected all men out there. (Talking about strictly fantasy football).
Second, let's talk big picture here. The trades I think are fair. I struck up a deal with someone else and we agreed upon it. Some of you think that's unfair and vetoed the trade. Fine, you can do that. Then you all want to remain anonymous. Wow, what a bunch of fruit cups. That's something I can't accept.
What are you all afraid of?
Are you afraid I will make fun of you in my blog?
Are you afraid I will try to get revenge?
Are you that afraid of a 22 year old that you have to hide behind the commish?
I hope you all get through this your head, I will find out who you are and I will get the last laugh. The only thing you can do now is enjoy this very corrupt ride I am about to put you all on or ban me from this woman's league. I don't want to play in a league that has a bunch of babies and doesn't allow innovation to happen.
See people like me are the reason why America keeps advancing. People like all of you are the reason the word boring was invented. I will use my more advanced brain to keep innovating this great country.
All of you uncreative people are the reason blockbuster survived for so long. You couldn't realize that better things are in front of you if you just used your brain once and a while.
Why should I be punished for looking ahead and realizing I could help myself out in the future. I am the 1% and you all are the 99%. I used my innovative and creative thinking to help me reach a level you all couldn't think of. Now you want to cry and hold a protest complaining, have some self respect.
Lastly, I just want to call out the people who have called me vindictive, an old pathetic man, and a quitter.
Melinda, you say I am vindictive. Ha. I am going to show you how vindictive I can get.
Nick, you call me a quitter. Ha. I am going to show you how to really quit.
Last but not least, William Brown.
The man I respect the most in this league.
William, you remind me so much of myself. You have a brilliant mind, you really do. You realized I was desperate to trade my players for draft picks so you suckered me into a 9th round draft pick knowing it was unfair. You found a weakness in the system and took advantage of it. I respect you. I would never cry and whine it's unfair because you understand the concept of "business".
See some of you out there who don't have majors in the college of business, probably don't understand all of the lingo I throw out such as "concept" and "sad" and the way the world works.
William knew I was going to take anything for a player so he played me into a 9th rounder. The dude knows how to negotiate. I am not going to fight with him of the validity of the trade because we both agreed upon it and it's done with. Good for you will for negotiating correctly.
Bob and Melinda, you welcome. I just gave your son some hands on experience in the business world.
When a trade happens for whatever reason, it's not your duty to veto it. The trade happened, get over it.
When the boson celtics traded all there players away for draft picks, did the league veto there trade? Nope
When the browns traded Trent Richardson to the colts for a draft pick, did the league veto that trade? Na.
Anyways lets get back to William.
William, even though you have my respect, there is just two things that bother me.
One, you vetoed my trade with Matt strictly on the basis of you worrying that I was going to throw the game. Knowshon Moreno is projected to score 18 points, my new pick up who I was going to use to replace him is projected to score 16. A 2 point difference buddy.
Besides William you won't beat Dave. He is a way better fantasy football manager than you and to be honest your wins have just been really lucky all season.
Second, your disrespect on your blog has gone far enough.
As a pathetic old man I am going to use you William to get what I want.
William, you will get the names of those who have wronged me and if you don't well you can kiss playoffs goodbye.
See what I plan to do is this:
If I don't receive the names of everyone who screwed me on each different trade by 11 pm tonight, I will text the commish at a random time letting him know something along the lines of this:
"I am going to release Steven Ridley to the waiver wire, go pick him up"
Your commish will now have to face the ultimate restraint of not picking up the player.
Could you all imagine Nicks team with all the best players and the only reason he has all of them is because I told him to pick them all up.
That seems unfair huh?
You all should probably cry some more.
Not to mention, Matthew will now have a free win this week which will increase his odds of making it into the playoffs.
William are you going to let your championship trophy slip from your fingers just because Nick wants to keep the names a secret?
No, it all seems so unfair.
Just release the names William and I will make sure my team has starters such as Alfred Morris and not people like jags D.
Now I don't want these two to have all the fun so I have one more little surprise for everyone.
The first person to put up a note on the leagues official site on Espn telling me who wronged me on each trade will receive my 6th round draft pick next year.
I must know who has wronged me.
The names of the people who have wronged me will be released by Thursday night by 11 pm or this league will suffer.
Corey Hewett- tick, tock.
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