1.) (LW #3) Mama's Homemade Salsa 4-2, 109.67 PPG [.180 NPRP]
UPSET SPECIAL this week as 3 of the top 5 teams lost to their opponents, cause quite the shake-up in our power rankings. However, for the THIRD time this season Mama's Homemade Salsa came out hot and beat the top team in the League.
And, while Victor Cruz struggled with 6 points on Thursday night, there was a spectacle going on this weekend:
And coming into Week Seven, Vegas LOVES the Salsa this week against number 2 Rank This, placing Mama as a record 69 point favorite. Expect some whoopin in the mix this week, as Nicky B looks to become the first owner to stay in first place for more than a week straight.
2.) (LW #5) Rank This 4-2, 106.33 PPG [.175 NPRP]
In a lucky jump in th polls, Dave has once again found himself among the top three after a CLOSE win against his wife Cheryl (for more, see "STAT TIME" under Kaep Happy below).
Dave almost made it to the top spot, coming to within .005 NPRP of the leader who he will face this week.
This matchup will be especially difficult, considering the fact that the New Orleans Saints are on a bye and Dave's top 2 draft picks are both Saints. No, this week Dave will most likely be starting Eli Manning at quarterback and Matt Forte as his only running back (Darren McFadden is also on Bye and James Starks is hurt).
Yes, it looks like it will be a fun weekend at the top of the Power Rankings.
3.) (LW #1) Cobra Commanders 4-2, 105.17 PPG [.173 NPRP]
A rough week for Mama Brown after hitting first place for the second time all season. And yet, despite Pey Pey's roughest week thus far, she still remains in the top 3, with so much room for improvement.
Despite her lowest scoring effort, a dismal 65 points, Mama B marched with digniy into a dogfight and escaped with honor and a respectable 105 points per game.
And this week, Melinda comes in as the underdog against a team looking to gain some dignity of it's own: VERSACE VERSACE. This game, while largely advertised as a blowout, should be a firefight to the end. Melinda's Commanders are the only team to not have dropped out of the Top 5 all-season, and Corey Hewett is looking to climb his way out of a last-place spot that has haunted him and any dreams of a legacy.
This game will shape the future of this league and of these two teams. That's why I'm predicting it to be my game of the week.
4.) (LW #7) Broken Clavicles 4-2, 99.5 PPG [.164 NPRP]
Well, just like with his father, Matt has surpassed my expectations thus far this season. This past weekend he spanked his younger brother in such a fashion that only an older brother can truly appreciate. Matt even texted me on Thursday night about the whoopin that he was about to lay on Curtis.
However, Matt also failed to write the blog that I asked him to last Thursday, and because of that I will NOT lay off on his team.
Matt's team is STILL 8th in the League in points per game despite his ranking. Luck has guided him, not hope, and definitely not skill. All four of his wins have seem to be flukes - sheer acts of God to have entertained us.
Unfortunately, Matt plays Bobby B this week, who now ranks dead last in points per game. So, more than likely, Matt will be moving up this time next week.
He's ruined the sanctity of this top-four. His team is a mockery to those of us who have spent our lives studying the sweet science of this beautiful game. He has soiled our Sunday best and slapped our imaginary children into the depths of space. This scum does not deserve this spot.
MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!
5.) (LW #2) What Would Jones Drew? 3-3, 107.17 PPG [.159 NPRP]
As if Roswell wasn't tough enough on the guy, he didn't submit his picks AND he suffred his roughest week of fantasy football yet.
The good news? Sean learns. And fast. This will be his lowest scoring game of the season and I thnk he bounces back this week with a big game against younger brother, Will.
And it gets better: Sean is ahead of Will in the rankings by a mere .003 NPRP, so this game will launch one team into stardom while forcing the other to my swallowed whole by the Sarlacc pit that is the bitter depths of the Power Rankings.
So will Sean squeak by by the 2 point advantage he was over Will in PPG?
6.) (LW #4) ~ Mosstradamus 3-3, 105.17 PPG [.156 NPRP]
Or will Will overcome adversity and propel himself back into the league's elite ranks? [Side note: See what I did there?]
Will suffered a difficult loss this week to Bobby B and his clowns despite Pops' starting of Calvin Johnson. This game, while not predicted to be much more than a minor speedbump on Will's road to a playoff spot, set him (and the league) back in a number of ways.
Firstly, it helped launch Matt into his ridiculously high spot. Secondly, it kept Corey in dead last despite his big win over Sean. And thirdly, it made Dad smile in the car ride home from Phoenix.
That is all.
7.) (LW #6) Probation 3-3, 103.83 PPG [.154 NPRP]
Oh, Curtis. Curtis, Curtis, Curtis. I'm so sorry, bud. Every time I back this team, they seem to lose to teams they should have beaten. So, due to this most recent tragedy, I will begin to bash this team in hopes that it reverse-jinxes them back to the top.
Curtis, do you really expect to beat your Mom this week? Every time you have played someone you have blood ties with, you've been dismantled. I mean, your Dad showed you the meaning of fury in week one and Matt taught you how to say it in 6 languages last week.
I mean, yeah, your mom has lost four games straight now, but I think this will be her week. Your team is weaker than I anticipated, and I'm just so upset that I backed you early.
You've disgraced my word, making it about as valuable as Kim Kardashian supporting something superficial. I can't even make that into a good joke because your team has broken my brain. Why can't you just change your team name? You know why I named it Probation Probation? Because I was lazy and already named Matt's team something funny. I mean...can you just....can you....CURTIS!
CUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!
Dear Cheryl,
I really hope you get a win this week. I think your team is really good. I mean, it's been a rough couple of weeks, but I believe in you. I thought that this was your week, but OF COURSE Dave had to get his vengeance from that game against my mom.
But don't worry! Things are going to turn around! My reverse jinx in Curtis' favor will probably triple-jinx in yours. If that doesn't make sense, don't worry, just believe in your team and push through the struggle. Dreams lay on the other side.
Love,
Nick.
9.) (LW #9) Insane Clown Posse 2-4, 88.33 PPG [.116 NPRP]
Dad, you got your second win. Somehow, you got it despite your obvious attempts to purposefully lose by starting players who are inactive AGAIN in order to gain a better draft pick next year.
Well I have bad news for you Dad, even if you finish dead last this year, it won't help your draft position next year.
And, with that revelation, I'm going to leave you here, as you wished to leave me. Buried alive. Buried alive.
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB!!!
10.) (LW #10) VERSACE VERSACE 1-5, 89 PPG [.102 NPRP]
It's a boy dance party! Versace not only got a win, but they won by 70, the largest margin of victory all season long. Well done, good sir, but you still need another to get out of 10th.
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